“If I Could Go Back” is planed for to be released 16th October 2025. This is one of my more personal songs, and one I struggled with for quite some time. This lyrics is about when you are with a person for many years, and believing that it will be you for life. Then loves fades, everything change and you loses not only your love but one of your best friends in life.
When I first started writing it, the lyrics were longer and much more detailed. They were filled with specific memories and moments from my own life, snapshots of love, loss, and the choices that shape who we become. That original version still exists, but it hasn’t been released… at least not yet. Maybe one day it will. For now, it remains a quiet part of my story, something I hold close.
As I worked on the song, I began to feel that it needed space, that the heart of it wasn’t in the details, but in the emotions that linger between the lines. I started cutting words, shortening phrases, and letting the silences say as much as the lyrics. It became more about reflection than recollection, about the way life changes us, and how, even through heartbreak, we eventually find meaning in the journey.
I imagined it as a slow ballad, something gentle, ambient, comforting and honest in it´s tone. I wanted the music to breathe, with piano and clarinet carrying that sense of time passing, like memories drifting in and out of focus.
Writing this song was like holding a mirror to myself. It’s an inner piece of who I am, a small conversation with my past, my choices, and the people who shaped me. And in the end, it became a song about acceptance. About realizing that every step, every mistake, every joy and loss brought me here.
I hope when you listen, you hear a little of your own story in it too. Because maybe, like me, you’ll find that even if you could go back, you wouldn’t change a thing because then it would be your life anymore.
Alicia Z.